And the Top 100 FedEx Small Biz contest finalists are as follows. Okay, are poetically as follows, thanks to one of our favorite poets, Maureen Doallas. Congratulations, finalists!
Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Business: A Spiced Up Ode
1
The Pink Glambulance delivers
A Little Bundle in a PackSack.
It takes TomTod Ideas to figure
out what to do with the result:
Three Bags Full in Kelly’s Closet.
2
Commander aka Retrieving Freedom
reBounces from Moustache Brewing, goes
off in an Upward Spiral and comes back
through The Looking Glass as Grace Green
Beauty wearing Kim Bloomberg Designs.
3
Girl Next Door Honey tried to light
a Downtown Candle to Spread
the Sparkle among NY Entrepreneurs.
KSDS reports they only wanted to use
Live Love Dew while breeding Peaceful
Acres Horses for The Spotted Trotter.
4
Every Gitchee Goat on Lyric Hill Farm
is into Fiber Art Now. It’s much cheaper
than Wolf Conservation and maybe
a little safer than that Droolin’ Moose
somebody set loose at Cox Family Winery.
5
Whenever Romney Ridge Farm Yarn wants
to Spice It Up, it heads to Zoomin Market real
quick for Paperbeads. Tridente International
promises Seeds of Happiness and a Ginger
Moon. Its motto is Be Free. Jest Paint.
6
Wecycle too long at Chez Moi, miss
DeJohn Photography taking pictures
at Spider Hall Farm, where those cute
NAVA Pets wear Camaj Fiber and Mushmina,
drink Nectar, and give into Fat Fancy
whenever approaching Cream of the Crop
Goat Dairy for a Cup2cake Drinkable Salad.
7
Owing to a run on SideStreet Burgers, the
Dedicated Motivated Endangered Wolf Center
at Goose Creek has been feeding Baby Ktan
Pig of the Month BBQ and playing that Rolens
Brothers Music for The Carrying On Project.
8
Too much carryin’ on at Arista Winery
and they’ll be denied The Good Cookies
& Beyond. Tri-City Monument features
B.A. Masks in stone and a gift certificate
to G.I. Money Magazine. Black Pearl Dog
Bakery runs a special every Tuesday
for Esposas Militares Hispanas wearing
Whimsey Lane Apparel cut from FatCat
Patterns during the APEX Movement hour.
9
The Bow Tie Shoppe fills Dream Baskets
with Phillip Ashley Chocolates. It will take
Groovy Green Glass to Unleash
the Golden Silhouette of The Stolen Pig.
10
A SpinChill with Dream Beard at the Xtreme Fun
Spot will cost a lot more than 2 little P’s
and probably leave you Raw and in need of
Somethin’ Sweet, like Pi-bytes and a good cup
of Guddina Coffee. The sensory packs
you Play2Learn in Sartonk ContainYaCrafts
The Boxcar Grocer picks up from the Retro
Dinner Diva and delivers to Jones Greenhouse.
11
If you’re in Beehive Chicago and down on
The Bee’s Knees, you won’t be picking up Skills
for Living at Teacher Lee Play-to-Learn Preschool.
12
Want to take a trip to Riley/Land? The teeVillain
will be popping up there any minute. Entry
will cost you A Real Treat: your candy
from A Gourmet Pantry.
13
The Redhead Creamery on Fat Toad Farm is
trading in Lace and Lilies. Both are Marked
and kept in stock by Heald & Chiampa Funeral Directors.
Photo by Brett Jordan, Creative Commons, via Flickr. Poems by Maureen Doallas.
_____
Stressed at work? Stressed that you didn’t win the contest? This book is for you:
Poetry at Work, by Glynn Young, foreword by Scott Edward Anderson
“This book is elemental.”
—Dave Malone
Read an Excerpt of Poetry at Work
Buy Poetry at Work at Amazon Now
The Top 100 FedEx Finalists, by Social Media Account and State
Note: we checked Twitter first, since we have a penchant for Twitter. If a business had linked to a “ghost” account or simply didn’t have a Twitter account, we moved on to Facebook to find (and congratulate) them.
On Twitter
1. @2LittlePs (293 followers) 2 Little P’s website, Virginia
2. @alittlebundle (357 followers) A Little Bundle website, Texas
3. @apexmovement (15, 100 followers) Apex Movement website, Colorado
4. @AristaWinery (4, 688 followers) Artista Winery website, California
5. @BabyKtan, (8, 035 followers) Baby K’Tan website, Florida
6. @Badassmasks (11, 300 followers) B.A. Masks website, Tennessee
7. @BeardCommander (53 followers) Beard Commander website, Texas
8. @beehivechicago (53 followers) Yelp Website, Illinois
9. @BeFreeRev (304 followers) Be Free Revolution website, Tennessee
10. @BlackPearlBaker (16 followers) Black Pearl Dog Bakery website, Indiana
11. @boxcargrocer (1, 548 followers) Box Car Grocers website, Georgia
12. @camajfiberarts (36 followers) Camaj Fiber Arts website, Florida
13. @CandyStoreKid (260 followers) A Real Treat website, California
14. @CarryingOnProj (251 followers) The Carrying On Project website, Washington DC
15. @chefmah (207 followers) Side Street Burgers website, Missouri
16. @ChezMoiBakery (461 followers) Chez Moi website, North Carolina
17. @dance2yarn (134 followers) Three Bags Full (Etsy, no official website), Maine
18. @diapershops (13, 200 followers) Kelly’s Closet website, Maine
19. @DMforLIFE (32 followers) DM for Life Website, Ohio
20. @DowntownCandle (269 followers) Downtown Candle website, Tennessee
21. @dreambaskets (206 followers) Dream baskets website, Illinois
22. @DreamBeardoils (13, 900 followers) Dream Beard Oils website, Georgia
23. @esposasmilusa (458 followers) Esposas Militaras website, Texas
24. @fatfancy (856 followers) Fat Fancy website, Oregon
25. @FatToadFarmVT (1, 304 followers) Fat Toad Farm website, Vermont
26. @FiberArtNow (2, 045 followers) Fiber Art Now website, Massachusetts
27. @Gazpachoalcaraz (22 followers) Gazpacho Alcaraz website, Florida
28. @GGreenBeauty (170 followers) Grace Green Beauty website, Ohio
29. @GingerMoonNYC (27 followers) Ginger Moon website, New York
30. @GoldenSilhouet (76 followers) Golden Sihouette website, Pennsylvania
31. @GroovyGreenGlas (302 followers) Groovy Green Glass (Etsy, no official website), South Carolina
32. @GuddinaCoffee (328 followers) Guddina Coffee website, Ohio
33. @IheartBBQ (3, 157 followers) Pig of the Month website, Ohio
34. @ItsTeacherLee (114 followers) Teacher Lee website, California
35. @JestPaint_com (10 followers) Jest Paint website, Michigan
36. @katyshamitz (163 followers) Skills for Living website, Massachusetts
37. @kimbloomberg (85 followers) Kim Bloomberg Designs website, Illinois
38. @LiveLoveDew (961 followers) Live Love Dew website, Ohio
39. @LyricHillFarm (272 followers) Lyric Hill Farm website, Connecticut
40. @MarkedLeather (113 followers) Marked Leather Shopify (no official website), Minnesota
41. @MoustacheBC (960 followers) Moustache Brewing Company website, New York
42. @Mushmina (314 followers) Mushmina website, Pennsylvania
43. @mypaperbeads (345 followers) Paper Beads website, California
44. @navapets (4, 280 followers) Nava Pets website, Florida
45. @NYEBN (24, 500 followers) New York Entrepreneurs Business website, New York
46. @nywolforg (2, 295 followers) Wolf Conservation Center website, New York
47. @PiBytes (18 followers) Pi Bytes website, Georgia
48. @RAWonWheels (85 followers) Raw Inc website, Virginia
49. @redheadcreamery (317 followers) Redhead Creamery website, Minnesota
50. @retrodinnerdiva (275 followers) Retro Dinner Diva website, Ohio
51. @RFI_dogs (81 followers) Retrieving Freedom website, Missouri
52. @RileyLandPantry (168 followers) Riley Land Pantry website, Tennessee & New York
53. @RomneyRidgeFarm (211 followers) Romney Ridge website, Maine
54. @SARTONK (15, 000 followers) Sartonk website, New Jersey
55. @seedofhappiness (266 followers) Seeds of Happiness website, Missouri
56. @SomethinSweet11 (416 followers) Somethin’ Sweet website, Indiana
57. @SpinChill (191 followers) Spin Chill website, Florida
58. @spottedtrotter (453 followers) Spotted Trotter website, Georgia
59. @STLWolfCenter (956 followers) Endangered Wolf Center website, Missouri
60. @teeVillain (635 followers) Tee Villain website, Louisiana
61. @thegoodcookies (170 followers) The Good Cookies website, California
62. @thePackSack (50 followers) The Pack Sack website, California
63. @tomtodideas (172 followers) Tom Tod Ideas, Ohio
64. @Tridente77 (9 followers) Tridente International website, Ohio
65. @UnleashLLC (37 followers) Unleash website, Washington
66. @UpSpiralCenter (16 followers) Upward Spiral website, Florida
67. @WeCycleAtlanta (279 followers) We Cycle website, Georgia
68. @WhimseyLaneAppa (85 followers) Whimsey Lane website, Utah
69. @ZoominMarket (131 followers) Zoom In Market website, Kansas
On Facebook
70. Cox Family Winery (FB group: 177 members), Cox Family Winery website, West Virginia
71. Cream of the Crop (362 likes) Cream of the Crop website, Tennessee
72. Cup2Cake (445 Likes) Cup2cake website, New York
73. DeJohn Photography (900 Likes) DeJohn Photography website, California
74. Droolin’ Moose (3, 654 Likes) Droolin’ Moose website, Minnesota
75. Fat Cat Patterns (7, 548 Likes) Fat Cat Patterns website, Texas
76. GI Money Magazine (1, 773 Likes), GI Money website, Florida
77. Girl Next Door Honey (1764 Likes) Girl Next Door Honey website, California
78. Gitchee Goat (504 Likes) CMT Farm website, Wisconsin
79. Goose Creek Candle (273, 000 Likes) Goose Creek Candle website, Kentucky
80. Heald and Chiampa (978 Likes) Heald and Chiampa website, Massachusetts
81. Nectar (624 Likes) Nectar website, New York
82. KSDS (2, 428 likes) KSDS Assistance Dogs website, Kansas
83. Lace and Lilies (1, 017 likes) Lace and Lilies website, Colorado
84. Peaceful Acres Horses (3, 097 Likes) Peaceful Acres Horses website, New York
85. Phillip Ashley Chocolates (2, 277 Likes) Phillip Ashley Chocolates website, Tennessee
86. Play2Learn Sensory Packs (529 likes) Play2 Learn Sensory Packs website, North Dakota
87. Rebounces (345 Likes) reBounces website, Arkansas
88. Rolens Brothers Music (658 Likes) Rolens Brothers website, Illinois
89. Scrap’n Easel (1, 168 Likes) Contain Ya Crafts website, Illinois
90. Spice it Up (874 Likes) Spice It Up website, New Jersey
91. Spider Hall Farm (2, 051 Likes) Spider Hall Farm Website, Maryland
92. Spread the Sparkle (1, 113 followers) Indiana
93. The Bees Knees (731 Likes) Bees Knees website, Missouri
94. The Bow Tie Shoppe (207 Likes) The Bow Tie Shoppe, Minnesota
95. The Pink Glambulance (731 Likes) The Pink Glambulance website, California
96. The Stolen Pig (544 Likes) The Stolen Pig website, Virginia
97. Tri-City Monument (206 Likes) Tri-City Monument website, Pennsylvania
98. X-Treme Fun Spot (813 Likes) Sports Park website, Arizona
Mystery Finalists
99. Jones Greenhouse FB page is non-existent if you click. Jones Greenhouse website seems to have no products. But the business is apparently in Missouri. (Update: one fan tells us she can see products but the hyperlinks aren’t clickable. Let us know what you can see?)
100. The Looking Glass Coffee & Curiosities (1, 223 likes) is a fun curiosity. Their website is a packaging group. Hmmmm. Aren’t *you* curious? Check out their page on the FedEx site if you want to play sleuth. Oh, and as for state, Tennessee.
- Persecuted Poets: Hearing the Voices Beyond Our Borders - November 30, 2016
- Writing with Matisse in Mind - October 26, 2016
- Healing with Poetry: Interview with Fred Foote (Part 3) - September 10, 2015
Jon Lewis says
good these r
Maureen Doallas says
Thank you, Jon.
My one defense: I was online later than usual.
L. L. Barkat says
lol, no need for defense! These were very hard to do, I can see. And they are funny and just so cool. 🙂
Sandra Heska King says
Squeeee! Awesomeness!
Elizabeth marshall says
Bravo my genius friend. poetry is in every fiber of your precious being.
Dolly@Soulstops says
Amazing…just in awe of how you wrote it, Maureen 🙂
Maureen Doallas says
Thank you, Sandra, Elizabeth, and Dolly. I do appreciate your generous words.
This one was harder to write than the Candy Bar poem ‘Hershey’s Got No Baby Ruth’.
Monica Sharman says
Love it! Can’t decide if 11 or 13 is my favorite. Thanks for the smiles, Maureen.
Maureen Doallas says
Thanks so much, Monica. I might play some more with the funeral directors and wildlife.
SimplyDarlene says
As is stands, that last sentence is mighty hysterical.
😉
Rhonda L. Jones says
Thank you, Maureen!
Maureen Doallas says
Thank you for stopping in, Rhonda. We try to have as much fun as possible here.
I wish you and Chez Moi much success. Congratulations on your finalist status.
SimplyDarlene says
iLike this:
Every Gitchee Goat on Lyric Hill Farm
Maureen Doallas says
Yes, Gitchee Goat is more poetic and memorable than CMT Farm.
Thank you for reading and commenting, Darlene.
Michelle says
Hi there! Michelle here, owner of Black Pearl Dog Bakery, one of the finalists. Cool poem–great idea!! 🙂
L. L. Barkat says
Welcome, Michelle, and congratulations. We figured a little fun was in order, to celebrate!